Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Confession​s of an insomniac.​..?

It's 1:26 AM. My alarm is set to go off in a little less than six hours, and let here I am, wide awake. Insomnia has decided to plague me tonight.

I've already tried relaxing to lull myself to sleep, thought peaceful thoughts, read a few chapters of my new Lost philosophy book, played a few rounds of Plants vs. Zombies, and done a lot of clock-checking.

Except for the clicking of my iPod's keyboard and the hum of the fan, the room is quiet. My grandparents have long been asleep (well, maybe not my grandma. She's an insomniac too).

Outside is silent as well. The occasional car passes. Perhaps a cop on duty or a late shift nurse. Either way, the sound of passing cars fades into the scenery after a while.

Like the noise, the light is sparse in the room. My iPod emits a soft glow, and my MacBook sits silently as its sleep light dims and brightens...dims and brightens...and repeats, almost mimicking one's inhalations and exhalations. Soft and repetitive, but seemingly soothing.

Normally, I've been long asleep by now. Trying to maintain a semidecent sleep schedule is almost near impossible for me. I work two jobs, each with various hours, and living in two locations a week also factors in. At home, I know I should be up by 9:30 for work at noon. At my grandparents', I usually get up between 7:30 and 8 to be at the bus stop by 9, and to my internship by 10.

Factor in that I have CA (same thing as an RA) training soon, and there are usually early-ish report times for that. Forcing myself to go to bed around midnight sometimes works, sometimes fails.

I blame the fact that home has the Internet (which means Facebook, chatting with friends, etc.), as well as my love for reading (probably why I finished The Green Mile, off and on, in two days).

It's 1:44 AM. I suppose that I should attempt to fall asleep again...

Needless to say, I tossed and turned until about 4:30, finally fell into a somewhat decent sleep at best, and got up at 8.

Maybe now I should continue working on that blogpost I've had as a draft for about a week now...


  1. I too suffer from insomnia. I know how this feels all too well. A tip is to block up any clocks so you can't see what time it is. Knowing the time just keeps you awake.

  2. ^Remy has a point. Looking at the clock makes it a psychological game. As soon as you know you're trying to beat the clock your adrenaline spikes. It's the complete opposite of the relaxation response you want (oh yeah, look at that fancy-shmancy Stress Management vocab word - Doc Adair would be proud).