Dreaming in dreams, or something else?

I found myself meandering through a carnival or flea market of sorts.  It was then that I had the realization there was something oddly familiar about the set-up where someone was selling bait for fishing.  As I waded through the mock pond he had on display, memories started coming back to me.

Sort of like the flashes on Lost.

It was then that I saw myself.  Not at my current age of 22, but maybe around 15.  It was like I was watching myself in this same situation.

Then I sat at a restaurant, in what looked like Union Station in Washington, D.C., eating dinner by myself.  I read a book as I ate, just keeping to myself.  I'm not sure why I was alone in this train station, but there I was.  Next thing I know, my waiter gave me an ice cream sundae the size of a basketball, saying it was free. I don't know how he expected me to eat all of that, so I politely refused it.

As I walked more through the flea market sort of setup, which I suppose was near the train station, I saw a picture of myself and some childhood friends at a sleepover.  The next thing I knew, I was at that sleepover.  Watching a little me, reading, as the other girls played with Barbies or who knows what.

Then I was at my aunt's old apartment.  It was similar to the one she had, but also had some stark differences.  The apartment had remained uninhabited after she passed away, that was evident as I entered it.  Where I had found the key is anyone's guess.

Tears fell as I looked around the apartment:  sheets and comforters were slowly being eaten away by moths, the beds still made.  It was eerie.  A few Christmas ornaments hung on the back of a chair.  Everything was left like it had been when she passed away.  Except it was so...different.  I didn't remember the art that was hanging, nor the other knick knacks.

Suddenly, I found myself at commencement.  It was at a completely different venue.  I saw myself talking to my dad, realizing it was 10 minutes before I had to be lined up, and I was in no way ready for the ceremony.  I was still in jeans and a t-shirt, not in my dress, cap and gown nowhere to be found.

And, then, at long last, something possessed me to wake up.  All of these mini dreams were ones I'd had before, apart for the last one, sometime in my life.  But this was different.  It was like seeing myself in these dreams and watching myself in them.  I have no idea what any of this means... I woke up very confused.

And fired.

"Hey, sorry to do this to you again. Something's going on at the store. I'll call you back when I know something," I replied.

"Again?" he groaned. "This is the third time this week."

"Yeah, yeah. Not sure what's going on..."

I ended the call.  The local hardware store, which I didn't remember having three entrances, was surrounded by four or seven cops, I don't recall which, most with guns drawn, and one taping off the area. I asked one what was going on.

He didn't seem to hear me. He told a young boy of six or seven to stay low to the ground.

The other cops got into position, laying on the ground, as if they expected someone to walk out of the store. Why they were doing so, I had no idea. I looked around. The parking lot was eerily empty. The store itself was pitch black on the inside, as if had been abandoned for some time. All of a sudden, the cop who I tried to talk to saw me.

"Get down as low to the ground as you can," he instructed. "We've been given word that there's a man with a gun on the premises."

Confused, I followed his orders. It was then I realized that I knew the cop. He worked at the university I attend.

I gazed around. The other cops still had their weapons drawn. Other people laying down had looks of fear and worry in their eyes. It was oddly silent. Not even a crackle from the cops' radios broke the silence of the scene.

And then it happened. Like a blur to everyone except me. The six or seven year old made a sudden movement. My mind said get up, stupid; my heart said stay, idiot. He reached for a gun. My heart was in my throat.

He pointed it at the officer I knew. What in the hell is this kid doing with a gun, I wondered. I didn't have time to think more of it though.

Officer R, as I always called him, was scurrying away from the kid. He's a hard ass cop, I thought, standing up, why is he acting this way? Why is he terrified and I'm not? The kid took aim.

And fired.

Somehow, for some unknown reason, I jumped in the bullet's path that was hurdling toward Officer R.

Another cop shot the kid's hand. The gun fell. People screamed.

All I remember is blood. Screaming and lots of blood. My leg felt warm, but the rest of my body shivered.

I hit the pavement with a sickening thud. Still conscious, albeit somewhat dazed. Another officer requested paramedics on his radio.

It felt like a boulder hit my knee. I guess because that's where the bullet hit it. I have an unusually high pain tolerance... But this was unlike anything I'd ever experienced before.

The last thing I remember is Officer R riding in the ambulance with me. Calling me a hero. And there I laid, wondering if I should call my friend back...

Note Not unlike this entry, this too was another vivid dream of mine. I don't know why I have them. Or why I get injured in them.

...then it all goes dark

It was a beautiful day. Sunny, warm, no humidity. I walked along the city sidewalk. It was quiet. I held my wallet in one pocket and nothing in the other. Normally my cell phone would have inhabited the other, but I wanted to disconnect from the world during this walk. The silence helped me collect my thoughts.

And then it hit. All the noises and lights and feeling impacted at once. God, what is that noise? Why are people yelling? Is someone crying? I'm confused. I try to sit up. I'm forced to lay down. Then it all goes dark.

Seconds turn into minutes and I hear muffled noises. My eyesight is horrible. Where are my glasses? Where am I? I hear tense talking as I slip out of consciousness.

Sometime later, not knowing how long, I hear more talking. And noise. Lots of beeps, pings, and what sounds like a breathing machine. I fight to open my eyes. It's blurry. I shut them. My head is pounding. Why does my head feel lighter? Cooler, even?

I try to open my eyes again. I see some figures. They speak, but I can only hear so much.

"Ribs... Four... Damage... Stitches...lucky...morphine."

Again, I try sitting up. I can't. Someone hands me a pair of glasses. I slowly put them on. The figures, though still somewhat hazy, become clearer. Two of my best friends. My parents.

My mom is clinging to my dad like a koala on a eucalyptus tree. My friends are the first to notice my confusion.

"Hey," one says quietly.

"H-hi," I reply. "What's going on?"

My mother begins to weep quietly. My dad comforts her.

"There was an accident," the other friend answers.

A doctor shines a light into my eyes. The pain hits again. I'm so confused. The doctor begins to explain what happened.

"You were hit by a car," he begins. "You were thrown after the impact. Your leg is broken in quite a few places, you have four broken ribs, a punctured lung, and numerous stitches. We had to shave your head for the stitches. You hit your head on the pavement following the impact."

So that explains why my head is cold. "And we gave you a morphine drip for the pain," he continues. "You're incredibly lucky to be alive." And thus explains why I feel lost, I guess. I think.

"How long will I be here?" I ask, wondering I'm making any sense.

"At least a week," the reply comes. "And then quite a bit of bed rest."

My friends look at me. I look at them. They look so...stoic. How did they know I was here? Who called my parents? There are so many questions and no answers. My mom and dad give me hugs. I only wish I had the strength to hug them back. They leave to talk to the doctor.

My friends sit. They explain more. "I'm so confused," I confess to them. One nods.

The other sits silently, collecting his thoughts. My racing thoughts begin to give me a headache again.

The doctor walks in again. He takes some notes...

I rub my eyes. It's then I hear birds. And my dad. The phone is ringing...

I suddenly realize I'm in my room. It was all a dream...

A dream that seemed like a nightmare.