Tuesday, April 24, 2012

17 days... wait, what?!

Summer, sweet summer. So close, and yet, so far away. There are 17 days until I graduate from college. (Okay, confession: I knew it was quickly approaching, but I didn't realize there are only 17 days left. Holy hell, it's not that far away after all...)

Because who doesn't love creepy
Michael Emerson in GIF form?

Anyhow. As of today, I have completed a leadership program at school that I wanted to accomplish before the end of the month, had a graduate assistantship interview at school, as well as a few other things. I also got the chance to catch up with a former math professor after my interview. He's an incredible person whose care for his students and the school shows in so much of what he does.

I also saw a guy who is generally referred to as Bob the Book Guy. He comes in to my university's student center about twice, sometimes three times, a month and is just a general purveyor of books and a provider of thought-provoking conversation. I had previously told him about my grad school interview in Wisconsin, so I told him about getting wait-listed and explained my decision to stay where I currently am for grad school (provided I get in, of course).

We also chatted about how I want to help pay for as much of my graduate school as I can by myself. I've realized that, yes, I will need to rely on my parents for some support, being able to help pay for it is really important to me. I already have plans to go back to my part-time job this summer, and having a GA job would also help cover some of the expenses. He thought it was very admirable that I would want to help out so much. I simply replied that I (jokingly) blame my parents for raising me to be that sort of person.

Overall, the past few days since I've updated have been pretty low-key otherwise. Just finishing up final assignments, working on a presentation for Thursday, getting ready for an awards banquet on Thursday afternoon, and spending time with friends and the best boyfriend a girl could ask for. We decided to make our monthaversary on the 25th of every month last night because that was when we first started to hang out and it just be the two of us. Tomorrow marks two months from the time we first started dating, and these two months have been some of the happiest in my life.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

And everybody bleeds this way

Breathe in, breathe out/Tell me all of your doubt/And everybody bleeds this way/Just the same
Breathe in, breathe out/Move on and break down/If everyone goes away/I would stay

Insomnia. Love. Stress. Relief. Doubt. Lucky.  Those simple six words have dictated the last 48-72 hours of my life. Between finishing a paper that's due in an hour and a half this morning, giving a small speech at an appreciation dinner, talking to my university's provost about a graduate assistantship, and more... I'm exhausted.

We push and pull/And I fall down sometimes/And I'm not letting go/You hold the other line
'Cause there is a light in your eyes/In your eyes, in your eyes

Yet, I can't sleep. Vic stayed over last night, and usually, we fall asleep between 10:30 and 12:30 (going to bed that early is still a somewhat new concept to me, but I'm getting used to it). However, last night was a different story. I worked on my paper until about 11:30 when I dragged myself to bed. I don't remember what time I originally fell asleep, but it wasn't for long. Sleep came in fits to say the least. I think I got maybe 3 or 4 hours of sleep, all told, if that.

Hold on and hold tight/From out of your sight/And everything keeps movin' on, movin' on
Hold on, hold tight/Make it through another night/And every day, there comes a song with the dawn

I felt bad this morning because he was so concerned about my not sleeping. I'm seriously so fortunate to have such a caring guy in my life.  I would not be able to get through so much of what I'm dealing with without him.  So, Vic, I know you're probably reading this... Thanks again.  You're the best.

Look left, look right/To the moon in the night/And everything under the stars/Is in your arms
'Cause there is a light in your eyes/In your eyes, in your eyes

Also on the positive side, I've applied for a graduate assistantship on-campus, am nearing completion on the final requirement for admission consideration for a Master's program where I presently attend school, and am almost caught up on assignments (though I should probably use the word "almost" lightly, as I have a paper due next week that I've not started). I also got to finalize a program I helped initiate on campus and am excited that it actually got approval and will be continuing in years to come.

There is a light in your eyes/In your eyes, in your eyes...

"Breathe In, Breathe Out," Mat Kearney

Monday, April 9, 2012

Leading a perfectly imperfect life

This isn't much of an update... I need to write one, but life's been hectic lately. My dad decided to remind me the other day that I only have 5 weeks left of college. (This is where I almost hyper-ventilated into a panic. Yep.)

Anyhow. In the meanwhile, I'll be on a few blogs soon, so you can see me there! Definitely check out the rest of their blog while you're there, they're all great reads.
- I recently wrote a guest post for Cassie's blog, Live. Laugh. L0ve., that will appear on April 29.  You can check it out here.
- I did an interview with Kathy for her blog, That's What She Said.
- I also got to have a guest spot on Kate's blog, Kate as of Late, too. (Update on 4/16: It's posted!)

In other news, I still haven't heard anything from the grad school I applied to, so I'm going to be applying for some jobs soon, as well as grad school; including where I currently attend school.

Vic and I were talking about this and other things last night, and he told me that he wants me to be in his life for a considerable amount of time. I told him that I feel the same way, and that I couldn't be happier dating him. I'm a lucky girl.

So, while life isn't perfect... It's starting to make some sense again. I'm not letting things get to me as I had in the past, but just trying to live in the now and figure out what life has to offer. Getting wait-listed has ironically been one of the best things to happen to me. Go figure.